10 months ago my sweet Joyce was taken home to heaven. I still ache for her and tears well up out of the blue. Each time I weep I treasure the moment. It's the only connection I have left with her. I'm grateful for the emotion. I'm not depressed and I'm not stuck in my grief - I just realize how blessed I was to be loved by her - God loved me thru her. My tears are a mixture of sorrow and thanksgiving.
Perhaps as I think about all that she and I and our family and our friends went thru, particularly a year ago this time, the intensity of those days rushes back. I can't avoid looking at the calendar and remembering. I still catch myself thinking from time to time, "did this really happen? How was that possible?" And then God gives His peace and comfort and my desire yearns to know the what not the why. I know God is faithful - even in the storms - and I know He continues to work in all our lives as we face and deal with our loss. I think I'm almost over asking the "why?" questions. Life indeed goes on and I want to know what God desires to do in my life as a result, or more accurately, as a fruit, of all that He allowed to happen.
Life now is a new chapter being written day by day. I am looking forward to what the Author and Finisher of my life unfolds!
In His Arm's,
Pat
Hi Pat,
ReplyDeleteI've been reading your blog for the past year and I was wondering if you realize how much you have grown in the Lord...I see it everytime I read your blog. People have the misconception that because you are a Christian you have it all together and are ready to face any trial...but in fact we cannot face any trial without or Lord Jesus next to us and leading us by the hand. Thank you Pastor Pat for holding on what to what is truth and always acknowledging that God is always there being faithful.
Dear Pastor Pat:
ReplyDeleteGod always gives you the right words to share with our church family. Through your experience we have all been changed. Life is a precious gift and should be treated as such. You were blessed to be loved by Joyce but don't forget that you too were a blessing to your beautiful "sweetheart" as you call her. The beautiful memories of the life you shared will keep your love for Joyce alive forever. Yours was a beautiful love story. You have come this far with the help of our dear Lord and with the love and support from your devoted church family. We are a family and we love each other very much. You have never suffered alone, we have been with you along the way
and because you were willing to share with us we have all been changed by it. We are so blessed to have you in our lives, you are one of the greatest gifts that God has shared with us. You have given so much of yourself to the ministry. You will be blessed. I know sometimes it is hard to see the blessings considering the suffering but there is so much love surrounding you and so many lifting you up in prayer, you must know how very much you are loved. As God instructs us in 1 John 4:7-12 "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. May these words comfort you today, you are always in my prayers.
In Christ's Love,
Kathy Gomez