The past couple of days brought developments in both my physical and emotional state. On the physical side, on Monday I had a barium enema test done which went as well as one of those can go :-( and basically showed no other problems in the colon besides what the CT scan showed with the thickening and constricting area of the sigmoid - so my doc has ordered surgery to be scheduled - don't have the date yet but probably within 4 to 6 weeks. The sooner the better as far as I'm concerned. I'm sure you all don't want to hear all the medical details of the procedure so I'll leave it right there - for now!

On the emotional and spiritual side, I began the process of bereavement counseling this week by first attending a session of "Griefshare" at Emmanuel Faith Comm. Church. It's a twelve week series which was in it's 11th week. I felt a little awkward there because #1 I was the youngest widowed person in attendance and #2 there were a lot of hurting people there and it was hard to not be in the "pastor" "caregiver" mode and just be a regular person who was hurting as well.
But it was interesting and the next session begins in mid September and I'll likely hook up with it from the beginning at that time.

I also drove up to San Clemente today and met with a grief counselor who was very helpful and not only helped me understand a little better what was going on emotionally, but also ministered to me thru the Word as well. It was good talking about how much I loved Joyce. He said that often the deeper the love the more intense the grief. And so we talked thru a bunch of things and I felt maybe the beginings of healing. It's going to take a long time but that's OK.

Tomorrow I'm meeting with another pastor friend who lost his wife to cancer this past April. I'm looking forward to our fellowship.

I'ld also like to ask you to please keep praying for my kids and relatives as they are also trying to cope with Joyce's death - it's been hard for them too.

One last thing, could you also please lift up my brother, Mike, in Illinois. He's been in chemo and radiation for esophagus cancer for several months now and is having a rough go being able to finish his final week of treatments. It's been postponed twice due to low blood counts and an infected feeding tube. Pray for relief and strength and complete remission of his cancer.

Love to all of you!

In His Arm's,

Pat